want a coke?

Okay things are a little more bearable. I think the problem is, I expected too much out of this trip. Like, as soon as I stepped off the bus my life would be so different, I would be fifty pounds lighter and infinitely stylish with incredibly good hair and quite possibly a Portuguese lover. But it's not, I'm not, my clothes are the same, I cut my hair into ugly oblivion and I haven't even talked to a single boy besides old men since I got here. Especially no Portuguese boy. So yeah, I'm pretty much the same old plain Karen Zurek. Plus sassy foreign edge and good old people skills. But yesterday was a bad day because I reflected on life and how I really am the same person, I have been my entire life despite drastic attempts to change. And I think that's a little bit disheartening. I hope that's a word.

Anyway, I read a lot here. I also eat watermelon, watch Big Brother 3 times every day it's on, and annoy my family by phoning daily.

But mostly I'm just lonely and I'm afraid this won't be limited to July 2005.

k bye.